The mystery is solved!

I've been SO busy preparing for Troy's deployment, which included a fairly busy and lengthy trip home to see the family. Lot's has happened with Baby though!

We had our 20week ultrasound appointment, which I had been waiting for for what felt like forever (what a weird sentence). I had to pull some strings and play the "my hubby is deploying" card in order to get the appointments (Dr appt and ultrasound appt) scheduled in the 10 day window that we had while in the Couve thankfully people are sympathetic and worked with me. So the only available appointment was 8 in the morning! If you remember I was totally worried about the whole drink a liter of water before the appt and don't use the bathroom 'til it's over thing, well it turned out that it was so early in the morning I think due to the fact that I hadn't had any water all night my body needed it and soaked it all up. Basically I never really had to pee as bad as i thought i was going to have to. I didn't find this out 'til I was laying on the table in the ultrasound room, but apparently the reason they needed the full bladder was not for the baby stuff, but so that they could see, measure, and check things on my body. My ovaries, the placenta... something else which i can't even remember now. After that she let me get up and go to the bathroom, then when i returned we looked at baby stuff. So it was not nearly as bad as I had anticipated!

Finally we got to see the baby!! The Dr. had to measure EVERYTHING on the baby from multiple angles. This is why the appointment takes around an hour. She measured the head, the body, the bones, the feet, the hands, the heart... Literally everything. So for most of the appointment we were looking at fairly weird and confusing pictures on the screen. Often times it was hard to tell what in the world we were looking at! ..."is that seriously a baby i see!??" It was pretty crazy to me that the Doc knew what she was looking at. She did really well at explaining to us what she was doing and measure and how the baby was positioned, so that cleared up much of the confusion. It was much like an anatomy class. She would explain to us where the bones were that she was looking at and what they were called. It was just so special and exciting to see our baby, all the different parts of our baby!

This is a picture of the baby's foot! The doc printed out a bunch of pics for us of random parts of the baby that we looked at (here's just a few of them). One thing that was really surprising for Troy and I both was that the baby looked like a skeleton! I thought we'd be looking at a baby with fat but it seriously looked like the baby just had nothing but bones. It was totally freaky! The doc said that it's normal and that at this point in time lots of babies look like skeletons because they haven't developed much fat yet.

Then came the fun part... the real reason that Troy and I, me in particular, had been waiting so long for this appointment... "do you want to know the gender if I'm able to see it?" asked the Doc. "YES!"

Well there it is! She said, it looks like the baby has BOY parts!

"yeah it definitely looks like boy parts. Congratulations!"

She has to say "looks like" in order to cover her butt in case the baby comes out a girl. She told us after checking three different times that it's definitely a boy, however with the ultrasound machine sometimes things can look different then they really are and every once in a while what they thought was a boy comes out into the world as a girl. I'm not too worried about it. It's definitely a boy!

Troy was so good about not teasing me or saying "i told you so" since i was hoping for a girl and he kept telling me it was for sure a boy. hind sight is 20/20 but I think we both knew it was a boy from day one. I had a dream one night, before I was ever even pregnant, that we had a baby boy and his name was so clearly Elijah David. Since then I told Troy that if we have a baby boy that will HAVE to be his name. Troy also said, after we found out i was pregnant, that we're definitely having a boy. We talked about girl names too just in case, but that one was harder to decide on and eventually no name really ever felt right to me, even after we had actually picked one. Troy said it's because we're not having a girl, that's why it doesn't feel right. He was so right! God must have told both of us in his own different ways :-)

All that being said... I'm so overjoyed!! I was hoping for a girl, but ultimately it does not matter at all which one we have. I'm so so so soooo excited he's a HE!! Our little Eli :-) I can't wait to meet him! It feels so very real now that we know who's in there. Eeek!! it's so exciting! I really cannot even find words sufficient enough to describe how this feels!

:-)



Hips don't lie

I'm officially half way through! It's so crazy it already feels like I've been pregnant forever, and at the same time it feels like it all is just starting. I've known since i was about 5weeks along, but only in the past couple weeks have a really been able to see and feel any major changes in my body. With no real sickness or anything difficult to deal with it feels like this whole pregnancy is just beginning.

I think I've found my "thing". Some women have  horrible morning sickness, or severe migraines, or other things that I can't even imagine that could be worse. Well my "thing" is horrible hip pain. My hips have hurt almost since the beginning, mostly at night when I slept. It wasn't too painful just really uncomfortable. Well now it feels like a sudden change occurred and I'm just in pain! Yesterday was horrible. All day long my hips were sore and hurting, especially the left one. It was worse when i was up walking around. As soon as I sat down i felt 100% better. But trying to sleep last night was a disaster. I think the only reason I finally crashed was because I was simply exhausted. I was in a lot of pain and tried everything i could think of, and every arrangement of pillows... nothing helped! Poor Troy, I'm sure i woke him up a million times last night!

After yesterday I decided just maybe it's something to worry about, so like I do with everything else, I Googled it. Basically what i found out is it's pretty normal, especially toward the second and third trimester to feel more hip pain. Turns out it's basically hormones cause the ligaments and muscles and joints to relax in preparation for birth. Unfortunately this can cause pain. A few websites offer some advice to help relieve this pain, however, it doesn't seem to be working for me :-(
The pillows do provide SOME minor relief... so i guess that's good.

Other then that, I'm just counting down the days 'til we find out if we're being blessed with a boy or a girl :-)

20 weeks 1day... the baby bump is coming slowly but surely!

Lets talk about melons!

okay maybe not real melons... but lets just say large oranges turned into large grapefruits in what feels like a matter of days!

OK i couldn't find a good picture of a grapefruit... but you get the idea.

It's really fascinating to me how quickly my body is changing. When ya really sit down and think about it, it's sort of crazy that with God's help, I'm creating a whole life out of nothing in only 9 months! What the heck! I would think it'd take at least a few years for something like that to happen... no wonder there's always talk about how children ruin women's bodies. It's a miracle we can make it out alive. All joking aside though, it's really a wonderful and exciting thing! I went from feeling a little down and a little too anxious because I was not seeing any physical signs of this baby, to literally growing a  tummy in a matter of days! It's crazy. I still think my baby bump is rather small and still not quite obvious but it is beginning to become more noticeable! My little bro and sis keep saying things like "i swear your tummy grew since i saw you this morning!" or "you're bigger then you were yesterday!"
it's really pretty amazing!

I'm feeling really excited because my big ultrasound appointment is coming up in two weeks!! AND Troy will be there!! We should get to find out if it's a boy or a girl at that time too. I seriously cannot wait!! The debate is still on until then. Troy is convinced we ARE having a boy. and I just really WANT to have a girl. No matter what happens though we'll both be THRILLED!

Quickening

I THINK i felt the baby move the other day!!!!
I'm not really sure about this, but it was sooo weird and sooo exciting! Almost all day off and on i kept feeling this really weird really quick sort of fluttery feeling in my tummy about two inches below my belly button, toward my right side. The weird thing was that it was not really anything i'd ever felt before. I'm still trying to decide if it was some sort of muscle spasm type of thing or if it was the beginning of baby movements.

I was doing a little reading on this and based on what i've read along with how far along i am (just over 17weeks) it's very possible that i'm beginning to feel something. The websites i've checked out say it's called quickening and it's basically the first fetal movements that the mother can actually feel. The ultrasound allows the doctors to see the baby moving before the mother can ever feel it, but this quickening is considered the first time or times the mother can finally feel it. On the link i posted it says this usually will happen around 20 weeks for a first timer, however, many other sites i've looked at say it can happen as early as 13-14 weeks. It all varies depending on the mama and the baby. No pregnancy is exactly the same as another.

What i felt was sort of this twitchy really quick feeling that would happen for maybe a couple minutes then go away, then maybe twenty minutes later it'd come back. The thing that was throwing me off was that it was in the exact same spot (which i didn't think over that long of a time period i would feel the baby in literally the exact same spot. I guess i figured that it'd be moving all over the place and i'd feel things in different places, but as i've thought about it more, it's very likely that it's just chillin there in the same place and might move its arm every so often in the same way) and that it almost hurt.... it didn't really hurt, but it felt sort of tingly like when you hit a nerve in your elbow. Not when you hit your funny bone really hard,cause we all know that just hurts, but this was more like a weird tingly twitchy sort of thing. Very hard to describe. But it didn't feel like it was any sort of gas and it felt like it was in my tummy in the "hollow" space where the baby is.

I have not felt this movement again since that day so I'm not sure if what i was feeling was actually the baby or not. It could just as easily have been some sort of muscle stretching or straining or maybe gas of some kind... shoot i guess it's likely that it could have been anything. But let me tell you, since i felt that i've been hoping to feel it again because if it is our baby moving, that's seriously the most exciting thing that's happened yet!

Blood draws, blood pressure, and a shot oh my!

Today I had another Dr visit. This one was basically just for the second portion of the screening i did back in July. The one that's suppose to test for Down Syndrome and Chromosome disorders, well technically for the potential of these things, it doesn't actually tell you if your baby has something or not, just the likely hood/possibility that he/she will have it. Anyways, so the first half of the test, if you don't remember, was an ultrasound to measure some kind of fluid and space behind the baby's neck as well as measuring the heart beat and length of the baby combined with a blood draw (from me, not from the baby).

The portion I did today was the second part which has to be done between 15 and 20weeks (I'm two days shy of 16 weeks) and all they do for this half is another blood draw. So they drew my blood, then I went to see the actual doctor. Who by the way was not the normal doctor I've been seeing because she was on vacation. Oh, this doesn't sit too well me, she was on vacation, okay fine everyone should go on vacation, but she specifically told me to schedule my appointment for today because she was going to make herself available for it. She also said she'd call me to make sure it got scheduled. Now why would a person promise things like this when they know that they're a doctor with a bazillion patients about to go on vacation and there's no way they're actually going to call or open their schedule? Come on. So of course, she didn't call, and when i finally called to make the appointment, she didn't have the day open, she was listed as still being out on vacation. Figures! So, not too big of a deal, just annoying. I saw a different doctor for this, who frankly I liked the first impression i got from her, so it was all good!

They took my blood, then i went in to see the doctor. Of course i saw a nurse first, she took my blood pressure and asked me a few questions, like if i had any cramping, blood, strange/abnormal discharge or anything else i was worried about. Thankfully, i have had none of the above and everything sounds fine! Oh i did learn that often times during pregnancy women's normal Vaginal discharge may become heavier or more frequent.. if your a girl that should make sense... if you're a boy you may have no clue about this and it might actually sound kinda gross. The best way i could think to describe this- i didn't know how else to explain the semi clear, whitish fluid that comes out in small amounts everyday as a way of keeping the Vagina clean and healthy- is that a woman's Vagina is like a self cleaning oven (lol) and everyday it lets out a little bit of a clear or whitish odorless, or slightly odored fluid that basically takes with it old dead cells from the Vagina and pushes them out to keep the Vagina clean, healthy and infection free! Anyways, during pregnancy this fluid can come out in a much heavier amount compared to what is "normal" for your body. It is considered "normal" for the pregnancy as long as it's not a weird color, greenish, brownish or yellowish, and as long as it does not have a foul or very strong smell. During pregnancy, this discharge can increase mostly due to the increased levels of Estrogen (which if I'm correct is the  hormone that aides in the production of this discharge in the first place. So obviously the more Estrogen, the more discharge! ) Who knew? Just when I was feeling a little uncomfortable about this "problem" I found out its in fact not a problem at all, its totally normal!

So....where was I....
They took my blood pressure, we chatted a little about the discharge then the nurse asks me if I've had a Tetanus shot or a Tetanus Diphtheria Pertussis (TDP) shot recently. Uhh.... I literally don't even remember the last time I had a shot, much less what kind of shot it was. I'm probably over due anyways... So she goes on to explain that in California they've had a lot of recent out breaks of Whooping Cough (Pertussis) and that they recommend that all pregnant women in their 2nd or 3rd trimester get the shot as well as all persons that are going to be around the baby before it's able to get the vaccine itself. In California they're labelling it an epidemic. So of course I had to get the shot! It was weird since it's been so long since i had a shot, but it didn't hurt too bad.

Finally i get to see the doctor. We chat about what my next steps should be since I'll be moving "home" soon and will be needing to transfer care. She asked me a few questions then looked at my blood pressure number that the nurse got and said she wanted a re-do because it was higher then normal for me. Coincidentally my blood pressure was taken right after i had my blood drawn, that paired with the simple fact that I'm in a doctor's office talking about possible bad things that could happen, no wonder my blood pressure was up! She re took it and it turned out fine and normal :-) yay! that was after we finally got to hear the baby heart beat! And she measured from my belly button to the top of my pubic area (basically where the hairs would stop growing... maybe a little lower). This was to measure the approx growth of my uterus. She said it was right on and looking great. So basically everything is good so far. Hence my blood pressure being perfectly back to normal.

I must admit that waiting an entire month between visits is hard on me. Partly because I'm so anxious about this little baby growing in me and the doctor visit is the only way i know everything is going okay. Since i can't feel the baby yet and I don't really have a tummy showing, it feels like nothing is happening. So by the end of the month I start getting anxious and worried and end up saying a lot of prayers asking for patience and strength and improvement on my capability of trusting in God to keep our baby safe and healthy. Its hard to have faith sometimes, but every time I've been to a doctor i get nothing but great results. This is a continuous reassurance that i should keep my faith and everything will be okay :-)

Oh! I'm just so excited for what's to come. Only about one more month until the "big ultrasound" where we'll finally get to see our baby again and finally get to know the gender (hopefully supposing the baby is positioned right and it's easy for them to see) I can't wait for this!

Shopoholic

So I went shopping today for the first time since I found out I was pregnant. Well maybe that wasn't the best idea... I'm 15 and a half weeks today and my tummy is not exactly what I would call a baby bump, but it's definitely not what it used to be. I feel like its growing fatter and fatter every day. Only a little at a time, but enough that I notice it. I think to anyone else it just looks like I eat too many burgers and drink too many beers, but to me, its the beginning of a baby bump. So how does this affect my shopping trip? Well, my boobs are getting bigger too, and my tummy is getting bigger. So I'm still in a medium size shirt, but it's too tight in the boobs and getting tight in the tummy, especially if it's something with buttons downt the front. I didn't even bother trying on pants, no way! I think I'll wait til I need some maternity clothes to do another shopping trip!

I bought a belly band, Bella band, beband thingy at Target. Oh, it's the Beband at Target and the Bella Band other places. Target's is the same thing just way cheaper. I bought one and thought I'd try it out, see if i like it. Today I took it for it's first test run. Awesome!! Seriously. My favorite jeans, which i could barely button, and could not even dream of sitting down in, i left unbuttoned and put the beband over them, what a brilliant idea. I wore my fave jeans around all day. The only issue I ran into was sitting down in the car, then getting back up, ever once in a while it'd kinda roll over itself, so I'd have to straighten it out a little. but some of that i think was because of how i was wearing it. Basically i put it on under my jeans, so that about half of it was under, then i folded the other half down over the top of my jeans. I'll have to play around with it and see what else works.

I didn't even explain what this is. Basically it's an elastic band that goes around your tummy and the idea is that during early pregnancy it allows you to leave your preprego jeans unbuttoned/unzipped and the band covers the zipper and button area so no one  knows your jeans aren't done up. It also helps hide it and gives you a smooth look under your shirts. Once your really big and pregnant looking you can use it stretched over the whole tummy (or most of it) which will allow you to wear your preprego shirts longer, basically it'll give you an adjustable layered look with your shirts, so you don't have to buy new ones. Then after the baby comes and you can't fit into your pre prego jeans, but your maternity jeans are just too big, it can be used in kinda the same way you used it at the beginning to hold your maternity jeans up. The idea is paying 17 bucks to let you keep most of your old clothes, saving money cuz you wont have to buy as many maternity clothes. Pretty brilliant if you ask me. It seems to work so far!

...and Taaaadaaaa! Looks like I'm just wearing a white T under a black T. The layered look that everyone is into now. Pretty sweet don't ya think!?

Sleepy Head

I can't sleep!!!!!

It's making me CRAZY. I try every position I can think of to get comfortable and I can never find one that actually is comfortable.  Besides that I'm still up at night running to the bathroom every couple hours. It's getting ridiculous. I LOVE my sleep. I don't know if I can deal with this, it makes me so frustrated. I've tried everything,eating right, working out everyday, going to bed at a reasonable hour.

Once I do finally get to sleep for good, I can't wake up in the morning because I'm so tired. There's been a few times where I've stayed in bed 'til almost 11am after going to bed at 9pm! If I could have slept that whole time it'd be insane! But noooooo.

Or I'll wake up with my neck hurting or my body hurting from being in the same position. It's so weird. I never had any of these problems before otherwise I'd say it's our mattress. But I slept soundly before I got pregnant. Man, is this a clue into the next few years of my life? oh no!

Baby furniture

Right now I'm sort of at a stand still as far as baby stuff goes. I feel like nothing is happening to my body at all. Actually that's a lie, my tummy is slowly but surely getting fatter and my back has been hurting lately. I'm not sure if it's because my husband was playing too rough in the swimming pool the other day and I'm feeling the effects now, or if i need to get my butt in gear and work out more regularly. Maybe it's a warning for what's to come and I need to take the warning. I'm not so sure just yet.

It has been impossible for me to sleep lately. On that one I'm not sure if it's because I'm feeling anxious and overwhelmed about the deployment. But, my body really hurts, like laying on my side, my joints seem to hurt at every pressure point. I never had a problem before, so it must be a baby thing. I was just thinking after all this crazy prego stuff we go through, it's a wonder we automatically love these little one's when they do finally come out. Anyone else in the world who did this to ya, messed with your body, your mind, and made you crazy for 9 months, it'd take a miracle from God for us to forgive them and love them after that. But nope, not babies. They're exempt from that i guess.... hmmm..... it must be because they're so dang cute ;-)

On a happy note, Troy and I decided it'd be nice to look at SOME baby stuff together before he leaves. We just looked online mostly at cribs/nursery sets (changing tables, dressers, etc) and strollers. I, admittedly was terrified of his taste. We have yet to buy furniture together but when he talks about it it scares me! I'm picky and particular and if i could have what i want we'd already have a beautiful new living room and bedroom. I LOVE watching HGTV and I love thinking about decorating and I've ALWAYS been so excited to have my own place to finally decorate the way that i want... now I'm married and have to take into consideration Troy's taste as well. Besides the fact that we're in an apartment and have decided to wait 'til we have a house to put the stuff in before we go out and pick out cute furniture. Anyways... I'm scared to death of his taste. I'm stubborn about cute furniture. When I have a vision I want to roll with it. Much to my surprise, we actually were able to compromise on this awesome crib and changing table that we'll probably end up getting.

This is AWESOME! It has the shape and wood that I was looking for and the practicality that Troy was looking for. It has an adjustable mattress, it turns into a toddler bed, a day bed, then later a full size bed frame.

Yea that's awesome right! and looks cute too. So we'll get that one, or one very similar to that. Now the argument stood around a changing table. Troy is convinced we don't need one. Which agreeably we could probably live without one, but whatever why would we!? It'd be so much more convenient and pleasant for me to have a changing table to use. Plus this one hides everything away, which is something i LOVE. I just love when there's doors and things to hide all the ugly unsightly things.

Plus it's cute!

I feel bad about this now, but my snappy moody mom-to-be attitude came out when we were talking about this. I said to him, "I didn't get a wedding, I didn't get to pick out our apartment or any furniture in it (that i didn't already own because of hand me downs), I don't get to live in a house with you that i get to decorate, I have to live in California away from my "home", I have to deal with you going to Afghanistan while I have a baby without you. I want ONE thing at least. Just let me pick out baby room stuff. Because I won't even get to make that the way I want because it'll have to double has a guest room and possibly an "office"!"

A little harsh, which i apologized for and I don't really blame him for, I agreed to all these things too, but sometimes it just gets me. It's stupid in the big scheme of things I know but It's our first baby. Let's learn from this one. I'm sure as more come and we have no money or means to splurge, we'll learn to just accept donations and hand me downs. But at least ONCE lets buy our own!

So, we're gonna!

We didn't pick an actual stroller that we want, but we did find a style that we both like. The one's with three wheels that can accommodate an infant carrier and a little later accommodate a toddler. We want one that's fairly compact. We're not looking for anything huge and bulky. The less stuff to deal with the better. We'd be happy to take suggestions if anyone can recommend one that's a reasonable price. Also we were looking at carriers, the one's that go on your front or your back. We'd love a recommendation for one of those too. We'd like one that isn't too girly and mom-ish looking, that Troy would feel comfortable wearing as well. I think right now we'd like a front facing one, where the baby sits on your tummy.

oh! this is so exciting, and so expensive! We've never done this before and would LOVE some advice and suggestions on great products (of any kind) that are affordable on a fairly small budget.

The Few. The Proud. The Marines.

oh wow okay so "the deployment" (dun dun dun...) is nearing... closer and closer it gets! For you who are wondering he is leaving mid October. Honestly, for the sake of doing my duty as Marine Wife, I'm keeping some details out of this blog as far as exactly when he leaves, exactly when he comes back, where he's going, etc. I'll be more then happy to answer questions in a more private email sort of way, but for the sake of our men I'd feel more comfortable being sorta vague since anyone who wants to can read this blog. And you know how SOME people are these days. They'll take any info they can get and use it their advantage to destroy other people's lives... for what reason? I really don't know.

That takes me to this horrible story I heard at one of our family deployment briefs. One of the ladies was telling us that this actually has happened to a lot of wives/family members with Marines gone away in Iraq or Afghanistan (or other deployments). You know how we see on the movies when the Marine dies and they send the "big boss man" to the wife's house to deliver the bad news... well I guess SOME people (those people i was referring to above) dress up in a fake marine uniform (the nice one, dress blues, not the camo and boots.) or possibly a real uniform that they obtained one way or another. Using info they've gathered from different sites such as Facebook, Myspace, different online blogs, they figure out who the wife is, where she lives and what her Marine's name is, what company he's with, where he is exactly, etc. Then the one guy goes to the house tells the wife the bad news (which is fake cuz her hubby is still alive wherever he's at) then asks for tons of personal info such as social security numbers and such, saying he needs that info in order to get the Marine home, or whatever other lame excuse he comes up with.

First of all.... WHO would do this!? What an absolutely horrible and shocking thing! I couldn't even believe it when i heard it. I guess I should not be surprised, but come on! Secondly, the Marine Corp already knows EVERYTHING about you and your Hubby, so as a wife, why on earth would you just give this guy all the info? come on! this is just horrible. Luckily, the ladies at the brief gave us a description of the proper protocol for this situation, which really, is very different from the process these scammers are using. Ugh! it just makes me sick to think that people would really take advantage of a Marine Wife, while her Husband is out potentially killing himself so that YOU can have a better life! ooooh it just sends me into a rage. People are just sick, sick, sick!

That story scared me enough to keep some information out of public access. Just know that he's leaving mid October and we need your prayers :-) and THANK YOU all very much, because both of us REALLY appreciate all the support that we're already receiving from family, friends and people we don't even know. We are so TRULY thankful for you all!

Thank you, Thank you VERY much

I'm feeling sentimental and emotional and just wanted to take a second to thank everyone for their advice and comments. Thanks for sharing your own stories. I LOVE that. It makes me smile and makes me feel better,like I'm not the only one in the world who's ever gone through this. Which obviously I'm not, but sometimes I start thinking, jeez there's no one who knows what I'm going through or what I'm thinking about. I would comment back on every comment, but that seems sorta silly.

I especially want to thank you Rox. It makes me feel better to hear from you because you at least know what's going on in my head with the whole military side of things, since you've been there. I really appreciate your tips and advice. Everyone else, don't be jealous! ;-) I appreciate all of your tips and advice as well, very very much. She just shares that special weirdness and confusion of the Marine Corp and deployment.

So keep 'em coming! Dont' be afraid that your story is not worth hearing, because to me, it's so totally worth it!

Thanks!!!! :-)

Short and Sweet

At our appointment yesterday, no ultrasound (which we thought there would be) so unfortunately Troy still  hasn't seen our baby on live video since the first appointment when it was just a little blob. He got to see the pictures that I have from the appointment on the 15th. So at least that's something. He did get to hear the heartbeat with me though which was really exciting for us! It was a super short appointment where we found out good news about most of the testing they did on the 15th. Basically everything bad came back negative and everything good came back positive. So for now, everything looks great and healthy! Yay!! That's exactly what we want to hear! Other then that, and the heartbeat, we found out we won't be able to see the baby again 'til about mid September (20weeks along) but at that appointment we'll get to find out (finally) if it's a boy or a girl! I can't wait for that!!! But September sure is far far far away from now! But on an up note, We'll get to find out together and we'll find out before Troy deploys.

To test or not to test

I'm SO excited!

I got to see our baby again yesterday! It's been almost a full month, I'm 12weeks2days now.

I went in to a different doctor, not my actual OB, to get some "tests" done to check for possibilities of Down Syndrome or other Chromosome Disorders. Don't freak out just yet... as far as we're aware, this doesn't run in my family or Troy's family but I figured, the tests are safe for me and the baby, so why not check for these things... ya never know!

The medical building I had to go to is a part of the hospital that I live near, and it was nearly impossible to figure out which building I was suppose to go to! And I had to pay for parking! Lame! At least that should be the only time I'm going to have to go to that building. So I get there, and end up having to wait almost 15 minutes past my scheduled appointment time...which was plain old boring! But the nurses were SO nice and SO easy to work with, it was really great!

Finally they call me back, and have me sit on the table for an ultrasound. Which I was so excited to do because I knew our baby would like a real baby by now. We'd actually be able to make out the head and arms and legs. And I just can't wait for the chance to see our baby again. It's so exciting to me, it makes me wanna jump for joy and cry all at the same time!!

This was my first ultrasound that they do on the outside of my tummy. Which was WAY more comfortable then last time. Basically they rub this jelly on your lower abdomen then use the little tool and run it over your tummy, angled whichever way they need to see what they need to see with the baby. There's a big screen that I can see on the wall in front of me while I'm laying down... and there it was.... our baby! Looking so cute and babyish already with a big head and little legs and arms (in the picture though, the arms didn't really show up, but don't be concerned, it really does have arms) 

So with this ultrasound she was going to measure the fluid space behind the baby's neck. I guess if this space is bigger then a certain measurement then it's possible the baby MIGHT be showing signs that could lead to Down Syndrome. She measured this space three different times, then gives the lab the largest measurement for the highest possible risk. She also measured the baby from the crown of it's head to the end of its butt. She said it's about 6cm, which is about 2inches. She then told me that that's a perfect length for the due date they gave me. So based on that, they have my due date correct so far, and the baby's growing just how it should be. 

Then... I got to hear the heartbeat!! She said she needed to measure the heart rate too. This was AWESOME, but also made me feel bad because I didn't think they'd let us hear it until my OB appointment on Monday which Troy actually gets to go to. He couldn't go to this appointment with me and was pretty bummed to find out what he missed :-( but happy everything was going good. Let me take a second to get all emotional.... He's really concerned with what he'll miss and it's getting hard to keep his spirits up about it as we get closer and closer to this deployment. It just breaks my heart because it's just so sad. I feel so bad for him and the two of us would really appreciate and really need your support and your prayers especially as the months progress. 

The heart beat was 155/min! Wow, that's fast. I didnt' realize that baby's hearts beat so quick. It sounded great! It was so exciting and made me feel sooo much better since I've sort of been in this drag since I have not really been aware of what's been going on with our baby. it helped sooo much to see and hear!

She then showed me where the baby's feet and legs were and explained how they were positioned and where the arms were and how they were positioned as well. It was actually pretty obvious and clear to me where they were. But one of the legs looked all weird and I guess it was folded under the baby sorta like criss cross applesauce style while the other was up and bent. Both of the arms were extended almost reaching up. We talked a little about this then she asked me if she was able to tell, if i wanted her to find out what the gender was. She implied it still might be too early, but she could try to see. AWWW!!! how tempting! I've been dying to know! But, I just could not bare to do that without Troy. He HAS to be there for that one! So MAYBE during my appointment on Monday, depending on what they're going to do, we can ask them to try to find out for us. I don't want to get my hopes up just yet, but oooh! i just want to know SO bad! Plus, I'm hoping for a girl, Troy's hoping for a boy and keeps jokingly rubbing it in that he KNOWS it's going to be a boy. How great would it be to say "i told you so!" when we find out it's actually a girl. :-P aww that will be a great day either way!

After the ultrasound was all done and everything looked good there, they sent me to the next room for the second portion of the test. I don't think I explained this before. Basically the test has two parts. The ultrasound which will measure that neck thing and the heartbeat, plus a blood sample taken from me. The blood then goes up to a lab where they'll check for proteins and such and depending on the number they get from that, if it's above "normal" then they'll place it in a category of say 1out of 500,000 chance of the baby having Down Syndrome, depending on how much they find in the blood the category could be a larger chance or smaller chance. Then, when I'm about 15-20 weeks along, they'll do one more blood test and take the numbers from both tests, add them, and determine a fairly realistic risk for Down Syndrome. At that point if everything's fine, we don't have to do anything. If not, they'll call us in to talk options for further testing and such.

So my right arm has this crazy vein that sticks out all the time and I always thought it'd be a good vein to draw blood from. But for some reason they always seem to pull the blood from my left arm. Well this time the lady actually looked at both arms and went for the right. Well, then we found out why they might be too scared to take it from the left all the time. She put the needle in my arm and it made the blood squirt out and drip down my arm. Ew! But she got what she needed to get and now I just wait.

"Dream, Dream, Dream..."

I've been having really weird and vivid dreams lately.
Normally my dreams are weird to begin with and I often attempt to explain them to Troy and he's just weirded out... they never make any sense, but would make great movies if I could explain them.


But lately, they've been REALLY weird and make NO sense. I've found myself dreaming about things that have nothing to do with anything, and within one dream I'll go many places and see many things and nothing seems to go together. To top it off they're very vivid and I actually remember them really well in the morning. It's really starting to freak me out... like last night I had this really scary dream that, like the others made no sense, but this one was scary! It's hard to explain, but I'm starting to think i was dreaming about a movie trailer for a new scary movie that's coming out. I felt like I'd seen it before. I was panting and whimpering and Troy had to wake me up because I was obviously scared of something. Then in the dark there half asleep I couldn't stop thinking about it and didn't want to go back to sleep for fear of falling back into the dream. It was scary.


Luckily most of the dreams I've been having are not scary. But still, this is just weird....
Has it happened to anyone else during pregnancy?

The Blue Fairy

Oh goodness! I'm just itching to go to my next Dr appointment! It'll be my second one and I SHOULD get to hear my baby's heart beat!!! I can't wait for that! I'm soooooo excited, it'll just be one more thing to make this really real.

I feel like I have an imaginary friend. I'm getting attatched to someone that still doesn't even feel real. I need the blue fairy to come along and make "it" a REAL boy or girl.

For now, my Dr feels like my own blue fairy. She gives me the ability to see and hear my baby, just more proof (until I have a tummy and can feel "it" moving) that I have not gone insane and created an imaginary friend baby.

I'm so excited to see how "it's" grown over the last month... i think it might be starting to look like a real baby instead of just a blob! OOOh!!! Then pretty soon I'll get to FINALLY find out what gender "it" is so i can stop calling it "it" and start buying cute baby clothes (hoping for lots of pink!)

What a worry wort

When saying that phrase worry wart, is it correct to say "worry wart" or "worry wort" anyone know??


I know this is probably another one of those totally normal things that every mom to be, especially first timers goes through... I feel like I'm worrying about EVERYTHING from what's happening/going to happen to my baby, to what's going on with me. Some of it I admit is probably a little vain and unnecessary but it's becoming hard to help!


I was at the dentist and the assistant told me that I'm more susceptible to gingivitis now that I'm pregnant. If you know me well you know that these perfect teeth didn't happen on their own! I work hard to keep my teeth cavity free, white and healthy. At times i believe it's become sort of an obsession of mine... I mean I won't even switch dentists, I know as soon as something is not "normal", I'm usually the one telling my dentist when there's a suspected cavity or "problem" occurring. I pay too much attention to my teeth, but hopefully I'll keep them all when I'm old because of it. Well I sorta brushed this off (no pun intended) and figured oh sure, that won't happen... but the other night I'm reading one of my pregnancy books, and there it was...
 " ...hormones also make the gums more susceptible to plaque and bacteria... possibly leading to gingivitis and even tooth decay." She wasn't kidding! Luckily so far I've seen no negative changes in my mouth, but have been inspired to floss more regularly. As anal as I am about my teeth, I'm still terrible at remembering to floss! It's sorta silly now that I'm writing about it,  but I was really freaked out about this possibility.

I've been praying and I know that in my heart I'm putting this baby and myself in God's hands and I'm confident that He'll take care of us, and through Him I should have no worries or fears. But come on! My head doesn't always agree with my heart and my head is taking all this information and creating at times, irrational fears.


Here's another one... something about hair popping up in places that it wasn't as visible before being pregnant. What!? Hello, I have ENOUGH hair! Again, if you know me well, you know that I'm definitely Dutch and German (that's what I'm blaming it on) and the hair is everywhere, thick and dark. It's been a problem I've been running from my whole life. Come on, I mean I have to shave my legs EVERY day if i want them stubble free. I swear sometimes it grows back by 5 o' clock... my own 5 o' clock shadow! Annoying! I'm not looking forward to this if it's going to happen to me. Maybe I have so much hair that I'll be spared any further inconvenience... I'll be pitied (spelling on that??) because I already have enough hair to comp for at least two people.


Sometimes I wonder if I'm making myself worry about stupid things like this because I feel like it's been too easy so far. Everyone is always complained about all the inconveniences of being pregnant, now, granted, I'm only in the 1st trimester still and have a very long way to go still, but overall, thus far, it's been a breeze... most of the time, almost as if nothing is going on. That alone kinda scares me! I mean... no morning sickness, no constipation, no loss of appetite, no staining, spotting, or discharges of any kind, and no nauseating smells (except the celery incident, but that just smelled gross, didn't make me sick) I mean really, I've just been totally moody, nauseous when I'm hungry (but nothing unbearable), very fatigued, and sometimes a little bloated... oh! and I just started getting headaches. I wonder if some of that is related to how bad i was eating all week. So I know symptoms are different for everyone and not everyone has everything, but it's just overall so much easier then I thought or ever heard it'd be ( I may change my mind about that statement later on).... maybe God's taking it easy on me because He's aware of the extreme emotional battle I'm going to face during this whole thing... with Troy leaving while I'm bringing our first child into the world without him....


I am getting very impatient about showing though. I'm tired of having to tell people I'm pregnant because there's no way they can tell. One thing that's been kinda weird, that I'm thinking has to do with bloating or possibly my bowels is one day I'll look in the mirror and definitely look like I'm starting to show, then the next day I'll look basically back to "normal" non pregnant size. I have gained some weight i think, I mean, unless my tummy always had this extra little pooch, i mean i know it did, but it feels bigger then it used too. Its not like a had a flat six pack tummy before hand, but I swear its getting bigger, but it doesn't feel hard like a baby tummy, it just feels like I ate too many burgers and gained 5lbs in my tummy. Weird... maybe it's just the fact that before now It's an area of my body that I'd always wanted to work on toning up, but never cared THAT much or spent so much time looking at it, so maybe I always looked this way and just didn't realize it... Troy says my tummy looks a little fatter then before... but same thing, it's not like he ever paid this much attention to my tummy either. Aw, it will be exciting to see a big pregnant belly!

Roses and Daisies

I just have to take a second to put it out there, mostly just to make you all jealous ;-) , that I officially have the sweetest hubby of them all. Despite my dramatic mood swings... which are definitely are in full swing!... he still loves me and still wants to do what he can to remind me that everything is going to be okay even though we've been through a few more tussles then normal lately. He had a work thing, basically  had to be gone for 24hrs, he left on Friday morning and got to come back home on Saturday morning.

Saturday morning, I'm sleeping still, it's about 9am, suddenly something wakes me up and I look over and Troy's crouched down beside the bed (like he was trying to sneak up on me and saw me move so he ducked down, but unfortunately for him, i saw him...busted!) with two bouquets of roses! How sweet! He stood up, gave me a big kiss, told me how he missed me while he was at work.... aw it was the sweetest thing! Later after showering and getting ready for the day, I come out to the kitchen and he's already trimmed the roses, put them in a vase and added a few colorful daisies to the bunch. It was so sweet of him! A much needed reminder of his appreciation and love. I've been feeling more then just a little like a crazy loon lately. Between the dramatic and nonsensical mood swings and the stress of the upcoming deployment. I've definitely not been the nicest person to be around so it was really nice to see that he still wants to do sweet things like this for me even though we're going through a bit of a rough time and even though I'm a bit of a snooty pants. **sigh... gosh I love him :-)

So back to prego talk...
I'm noticing extreme mood swings lately. Seriously... it's like PMS on overload. I cannot even begin to explain it, especially to a guy. I think the boys think it's fake... I've heard too many jokes about how PMS is something we ladies make up just to be able to be snooty for a while. Well apparently the same thing is happening with pregnancy and it's REAL. Seriously, there's like a million hormones coursing through my body, the combination of them must be making me crazy! So one second I'll be sitting here laughing, feeling great, five minutes later I'll be crying about something, or be freaking out because I'm irritated. It's just too weird to handle! Hopefully it'll calm down a little.

A little side note, I found the latest (i think it's the latest) edition of "What to Expect When You're Expecting"
on Amazon.com for like 4 bucks! Total score! However, you'll find it's sorta silly but you'll pay the same or a little more for shipping. But still under 10 dollars for a book i saw at Barnes and Noble for about 30 dollars. Sounds good to me!

Oh my gosh, and don't even get me started on the food thing! Wow, We've been so bad lately! I think one of the most difficult things for me to do is eat really healthy. I'm a sucker for junk food, empty calories, fast food, oooh and ice cream! I LOVE it all! It's just so delicious. I will be the first to admit though, it's disgusting, horrible for your body, and makes you feel like crap after you eat it. Most of the time I can stop myself from eating this stuff because I just flat out won't buy it. Since I'm the one doing the grocery shopping, it's pretty easy. However, lately I have not felt like doing anything, I mean seriously, by the time 6pm roles around, and it's time to make dinner, that's the LAST thing I want to do. So Troy and I have been eating out almost all week. It's horrible. I'm starting to feel even worse then I ever thought I could. Not to mention it's been ages since I've eaten this way, and my body just hates it now. So, first thing's first, back to our normal healthy eating habits.

I know, for my baby's health I'll need to gain weight, but not like this. Not straight up empty calories and fat that will do  nothing for me and nothing for our baby. So back to the list of good food to eat that the Dr gave me. Which actually, I'm worrying about that. I'm worried about not getting all the nutrients I'll need to get. Frankly I just don't feel like eating all the things I should eat. It's more that I just feel to tired to even make something. This as got to quit too. Hopefully my energy level will pick back up soon!

I Poo in blue

oh jeez, I thought this was SO funny when I first saw it!
I just HAD to share it with you all

I'm sorry

It seems that I have bothered or possibly offended a couple people who i care about with the details of my post about my first doctor's appointment. I could be way off base here because no one has actually come to me directly, but through the grapevine it appears that a couple people are at least bothered. So I just wanted to apologize. I'm sorry, if you're one of those people, please know that it was never my intention to disturb or upset you.


Please allow me to give an explanation of where my head's at on this.
I probably should have put a bit of a disclaimer, if you will, on my first blog post to avoid any possible misunderstandings. Initially in creating my blog I had the intention of using this as an outlet for myself, for my own personal emotional and physical experiences during and possibly after my first pregnancy. I didn't honestly think anyone would be interested in what i had to say, and didn't necessarily intend to use that as a deciding fact for what i decided to say (i am pleased to find that you are reading this, it makes me feel a lot better then i thought it would! It makes me feel like you all are interested in my thoughts). I've always been better at getting my thoughts and feelings out on paper and saw it as a great opportunity for myself because of the ridiculous range of emotions I know I'm going to go through during this next year. Especially with Troy's deployment occurring in the next few months. It's going to have a huge impact on me and a huge impact on this pregnancy. I will be looking for support. I've never been pregnant before and there's a lot I don't know. After a discussion with some friends of mine, I decided it'd be nice to see another woman talk about pregnancy in detail in a "girl talk" way instead of text book generalities. I have found, even this far, that what helps me the most is hearing stories of other women's experiences.


I thought this would give me the opportunity to share some of the things I'll learn through describing my experiences as well as gain information through feedback of other's personal experiences. Nothing I have said or will say is going to be anything that's not considered normal practice or procedure by doctors (unless of course something unthinkable happens, in that case i may or may not talk about it) If you've been keeping up with my blog thus far, the area of concern is in my description of a vaginal ultrasound, pap smear, and breast exam. All these procedures and exams are considered normal and are described in every pregnancy book I've read or scanned through so far as well as being thought of as normal female education, meaning most females are aware of these and the procedures involved and have even experienced them. However, I was not aware until my first appointment and figured if I didn't know, there's other girls/women who also don't know. In an attempt to be both considerate and professional i used only a text book descriptions and labelling for these procedures. My only intent on sharing this information was to put the education out there about natural/normal procedures that are put in place simply to protect us and our babies. I just wanted to share what i learned.


Again I apologize if I did bother or upset anyone. Please understand that it is my intent to be both correct and professional in any further descriptions of doctor procedures or exams. I mean no disrespect to anyone and will not use slang words or derogitory verbage, but I do feel it's something that should be shared. I also feel that God gave us this beautiful privilage of carrying and delievering new babies into the world and he also privilaged us with the knowledge and science to perform many extensive exams to protect ourselves and our new babies. As one woman to another, I honestly feel that it is our responsibility to be unashamed of these things and to share them with eachother. We're only helping ourselves and our loved ones by being educated.


I hope this clears up any confusion and gives you a better idea of the angle I will be taking with my blog.


:-)

It's a waiting game

OK, my jeans are getting a little tighter, I'm feeling a little more bloated, but still not showing. I still look like all the other regular girls who aren't with baby.


I've had the opportunity to spend a little more time around some of the Marine's wives, half of which are obviously pregnant, and i must admit (I'll probably kick myself for saying this once I'm actually in their shoes) I'm a little jealous. I'm ready to really feel like this is real. It still hasn't quite hit me yet. I think it's because I've really had hardly any symptoms and I'm not showing. The biggest, most difficult symptom I've had to overcome is feeling tired all the time. I swear I can easily sleep for twelve hours a night if I let myself (and i have a couple times) Luckily I have had only minor nausea, which seems to directly correlate to being hungry. If I'm not hungry, I'm not nauseous.


I already feel like I'm in a never ending waiting game, and laughing at myself because further down the road I think I'll completely contradict myself and be wishing it was over or wishing i was back to the beginning again.
It's still really early, only about 10 weeks along, I think there's a lot of women who may have just found out they're pregnant at this point.
I guess it's probably a normal feeling to have... anyone else remember feeling this way?

Super powers

I have officially developed my very own super power. It's not even one of those awesome super powers like being able fly. I now have super human sent!

This is just weird! I can smell things that other people don't even know exist. I could probably smell something a mile away...

The other day i was taking a shower, once i was finished i walked out into the living room. There Troy was just sitting on the couch watching TV. All of a sudden this horrendous smell hits my nose! It was SO nasty! It was SO bad i could not even tell what it was! Some kind of gross mix of old peanut butter and dirt. It was like someone had just cooked some really nasty food... The culprit: Troy. So with a look of disgust I ask him, "what in the world did you just eat!!" He appeared to be a little freaked out by my dramatic response and in an attempt to save himself he replies with, ".... uh, nothing..??? why??"
"Because it stinks in here! It smells so disgusting! What did you make!??"
".... I just had some celery with peanut butter on it :-/ "
"wow!! how much did you have! I can smell that through the whole place!"
"uh... like a stick or two"

Can you believe that!?? I was shocked. I ate the exact same thing not two days earlier and it was delicious and didn't smell bad at all. I was so surprised by how bad it smelled and how strong it smelled. I mean c'mon, normally I would not even be able to smell something like that! But it was as if someone was holding it right under my nose. It was so weird!

Poor Troy, must have been thinking he had done something wrong. I rarely react to the smell of anything, so this probably came as quite a freaky surprise to him!

Not necessarily the best super power to have developed. It seems like most things just smell really bad!

Oh! But there is one thing that I'm so loving the smell of. This is something I've always thought smelled pretty good but mostly because it makes me think of family BBQs and summer time, the actual smell itself is not all that fabulous, but now.... oh its a whole different story! The smell of someone grilling. Grilling anything, it doesn't matter. It smells so fantastic! I smell it all the time since it's nice here families are always grilling for dinner. It's so wonderful I'm almost of the verge of walking over to them and just standing there, "Don't mind me, I just want to smell your dinner!"